Candy Corn Fattens Up

I am not someone who feels the need to eat chocolate, cookies or cake regularly. I much prefer real foods. However, I have never met a sugary candy I don't like (peeps, twizzlers, gummy bears, Swedish fish, i.e.).
With that type of sweet tooth, I have been able fool myself with the 0 fat content. Yes, I know it is all sugar that turns into fat, but at that moment I am enjoying the treat it has 0 fat.
I just gave you insight into the brain of someone who has battled weight for years. I know it is twisted, but it is really how my mind works.
But now, I have been thrown a loop. Something that tastes like candy corn (yum) but is white chocolate (my chocolate of choice) so it has a fat content.
I'm trying to decide...is this a good treat for me because I can not hide behind the 0 fat? As I pick it up I KNOW it contains fat. Has M&M's invented a candy to curb me in the amount of sweets I eat?
Either way, I have seen the pumpkin peeps, the candy corn, etc. out in the stores already. I better start 2-a-days right away!


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Outgrowing My Relationsip with ESPN

It's not me... It's you.
We have all had that friend in your life who we needed to move on from.  Sometimes it is because you have grown apart.  Sometimes you find that you have moved on to greener pastures and they want to keep you down.  Other times it is that you can't stand by and watch the harm they are causing themselves and those around them.  It is for that last reason that I can no longer maintain the same relationship with ESPN.  It hurts me to watch them undermine what made them great.
Anyone who knows me is painfully aware of my passion for all things sports.  I am the girl who is offended if you send me a wedding invitation for the date/time of a Jets game.  I have a dog named after my beloved Shea Stadium. 
I am not sure the first time I watched ESPN, but I am sure it was well after their 1979 start.  I can tell you that since I started watching, I haven't stopped.  I spent every Sunday in most of  the 90's drinking coffee out of my "Bristol University" mug.  I DVR Outside the Lines everyday and Sports Reporters on Sundays.  During Football season I spend hours watching Countdown.  I have stood by ESPN when I thought that they let people leave who were wonderful and when they have kept people (mostly ex-athletes) even though they had no grasp on the English language.
ESPN has now lost their ability to just REPORT news in the sports world.  Instead, they now chose to become the news or make content decisions based on who they want to build up / tear down.
There are so many examples of this that I will try to restrain myself, but here is a tasting:

• University of Miami - Last summer ESPN stopped regular programming to report the demise of the U.  They had round table discussions about the future of Miami and if they could survive.  All of this was based off the allegations of a Ponzi schemer in prison.  Since that time nothing has been validated, ESPN has not mentioned it, nor have they acknowledged that they jumped on something without checking facts, like a responsible news source does.  Don't get this twisted, if this was Notre Dame, Duke, i.e. the "story" would have been handled differently.
• University of North Carolina - This story is the exact proof needed to affirm my last sentence above.  Despite the UNC academic scandal being front page news for the local paper, News & Observer, ESPN has barely touched the story. They did some reporting on it when the NCAA was in Chapel Hill, but now that the beloved UNC basketball program may be involved, ESPN has not touched it.  Not even on Outside the Lines as an open question and to get public opinion. Since the story resurfaced, there have been 2 MORE stories about Penn State (because that hasn't been over covered). 
• Sean  Payton - This Sunday's Outside the Line program may have tossed me over the edge.  I am indifferent about Sean Payton.  I admire what he has accomplished as a coach and question his ethics at the same time.  However since the 2009 season when Payton coached the Saints to a Super Bowl Championship which lifted the depressed post-Katrina New Orleans, ESPN has held Payton in high regard.  He was made out to be a genius who also doubled as an actual Saint with his involvement in the community.  In all the profiles I watched about him, I never heard a bad word.  Today an entire OTL segment was devoted to how his character is questionable.  I understand that we all didn't know about "bounty-gate" prior to this off season.  However, they have dragged out witness after witness about how he is rude and arrogant.  They are now telling us that the local reporters can't stand him because he lays into them with curses and pulling of privileges.  There is no way that while researching previous pieces, that ESPN was unaware of these unfavorable opinions. Way to go ESPN... build up a man to deity and then tear him down. 
• LeBron James - I was one of the countless fans that was disgusted by the egotistical display that is now known as "The Decision" when LeBron announced he was "Taking .. [his] talents to South Beach".  The public was outraged and ESPN then agreed with the public and began reporting on him like he was a Diva.  They questioned his heart and ability to close a big time game.  They never ONCE took any responsibility that they payed for "The Decision".  They planned, aired and promoted it.  ESPN made this happen and then left LeBron to pick up the pieces.  I guess he can be grateful that now he won a championship and so they have decided to befriend him again.

Perhaps it is because many who work for ESPN have loyalties to teams they played for, athletes/coaches/management they have played with, or their alumni affiliations.  But whatever the reason they have decided to make some people absolute villains and to anoint others as the next coming.   They have torn down so many people/programs and yet did not inform the public about others to maintain certain images.  It is irresponsible and self-divulging. 
ESPN's viewing public deserves better in return for our years of loyalty.  I feel like I need to pull back on my devotion to them.  So, although I love my Countdown Crew, I have decided to settle for the CBS team this year. Unfortunately, I am one person and "This is going to hurt me more than it does you."

Trying Chevy's Ale House, Apex, NC

Living on the Apex / Holly Springs border is straddling between enjoying a suburban small town laid back lifestyle and feeling far away from anything.  We are clearly not in the boondocks, but at the same time when it comes to stores and restaurants, the selection here is lacking.  We have a lot to chose from in Cary & Raleigh, but just not within 5 minutes.
So, when I returned from my vacation in New York, I was excited to see that Chevy's Ale House had opened at 55 & 1 (Old Ocean Stars location).  I enjoy My Way and go there often enough, but was hoping that this could become another option.  After hearing numerous not-so-great reviews, I decided to wait a couple of weeks to give them a try, with no expectations.
Now that they have been open a month, I hopped over with a friend to check it out.  Honestly, the biggest issue that bothered me right away was if you come from the 55 business area, you need to go down an extra block and make a U-Turn, which is just annoying (minus a point). 
As it has been for the past month the parking lot was full which is always somewhat encouraging when checking out a new restaurant.  After waiting a few minutes to get seated (despite plenty of open tables and available staff), I was starting to think the reviews I heard of poor service were correct (minus a point = -2). 
The layout is spacious, the bar is a decent size, there is a large outside patio, many large TVs (playing the Jets/Giants game) and even a Mark Sanchez framed jersey on the wall. (point scored = -1).
After being seated, the waitress did attend to our beverage needs quickly and efficiently (point scored = 0).  from the list of approximately 15 beers on tap (point scored = +1).
A nice surprise was our waitress brought us a basket of popcorn to the table.  Who doesn't love some popcorn? It reminded me Ground Round as a kid on Long Island. (point scored = +2).
The menu (http://www.chevysalehouse.com/menu) is fairly typical Sports Bar food, at fairly typical prices. They probably offer too many selections for their own good.  Often these type of establishments would better serve themselves with a bit fewer options so the kitchen can focus on quality. 
I considered many menu items.  As usual, I immediately disregard any Italian options (meatball sub, pizza, i.e.) as I am a harsh critic on Italian food.  Finally, my friend and I decide on ordering 2 sandwiches and splitting them - the Ham & Turkey on Pretzel Roll and the Meatloaf Sandwich.
The food arrived in a very reasonable amount of time (although I didn't time it, I remember being pleased when she arrived at the table).   
I was a bit shocked at the size of the sandwiches.  They were piled high with meat and, therefore, reminded me of Long Island sandwiches.  The ham was a decent cold cut and the turkey was clearly carved, not a processed cold cut.  The pretzel roll was hot and yummy.  The one suggestion I would make is to heat the ham and turkey so the temperature differential does not impact the overall taste.
The meatloaf was above par.  Each sandwich came with a handful of decent french fries and I was pleased to see that they did not give each meal a pound of fries. (point scored = +3).
Throughout the meal the manager and assistant manger came to our table to make sure all was okay.  They did manage to do so in a non-intrusive manner (pet peave of mine).  Most importantly, this convinced me that they had heard the tough reviews on the street and were making every effort to get it right.  (point scored = +4). 
All in all, it is a good place.  It is a good place for what it is.  Are you going to take someone there to impress them (1st date, client, in-laws)? No, but it is not that kind of place.  It is a place to catch up with friends, get a bite to eat, have a few drinks and/or watch the game.  And for that, they are a good option. 
The crowd is the same type of random crowd you get at Bass Lake Draft House, Salem Street Pub or My Way, with families and individuals ranging from mid 20's to 70s.
I do plan on going back on a Saturday night, as they do have live bands every Saturday at 10 PM.  I would like to see what crowd they are getting for that.  Are they pulling the "dressed up to go out" Tony's Oyster Bar crowd or the laid back Holly Springs bar patrons?  Additionally, I am extremely curious to know if they dim the lights for the nighttime bar atmosphere, because if not, you may get blinded by the bright lives when you walk in. 
This location has been many restaurants in the past 4 years and I would like to see this place succeed. So, if you are in the Apex/Holly Springs area, give it a try.  Just go in with reasonable expectations.

Has it been 8 years Already? It has only been 8 years?

As I settle in to enjoy the first night of NFL, there is something nagging at my heart. I look forward to this day for 7 months. I have spent the past 4 weekends rushing around to complete tasks around the house so I don't feel so guilty when I spend the next 17 Sundays hanging onto every over-analyzed comment some has-been wants to throw at me. Hell, the Mets even decided to pack it in more than a month ago so I could dedicate myself fully to the NFL games and my beloved Fantasy Team, "The Long Island Hell Cats." So why am I lacking the excitement I usually have and my heart, so heavy?
Eight years ago our country changed (or at least should have) forever. And even if you think I am overstating that I can assure you that I changed forever that day.
At the time I was working for the Muscular Dystrophy Association as a District Director. It was a job I loved in so many ways. I will spare you the negatives at this point in time. Working at MDA I met so many amazing people who handled challenges that I could never imagine better than I handled finding a dress to wear to an event. From children knowing that they would never grow as old as I was at the time (in my late 20s) to those around my age who knew they would never see their newborn's 5th birthday. The strength these individuals and their families showed me everyday was nothing short of inspiring. I always thought what I saw at MDA would be the best and worst I would ever see.
Despite acknowledging that everyday, I still let my own life struggles get the best of me at times. September 10, 2001 was one of those days. In some ways it was a typical "nothing goes right" Monday after an exhausting summer of golf tournaments and various "athon"s. Additionally, I was still struggling with the death of my dear PaPa in August. After a very long day at work, I went home, ate dinner, spoke to a friend on the phone and then headed to bed early.
As my alarm went of on that Tuesday morning, I grunted (as usual), hit snooze a few times and made my way to the bathroom. After popping my contacts in, I headed back to the bedroom to figure out what I wanted to wear. The clock caught my eye and realized I had left my alarm set for 2 hours early, when I had to awake on Monday. I snuggled back into my bed to catch a few more zzzs but could not. So, reluctantly, I made a decision to have a good day. I changed my clothes, headed to the living area and had an early morning date with my on-again-off-again boyfriend Billy Blanks. Once Tae Bo had my blood pumping I got into the shower and off I went.
As I drove to pick up the "Long Island Champion Breakfast" of a Large Coffee and Buttered Roll from 7-Eleven, the amazingly blue sky caught my eye. Upon exiting with my treats in hand, I stopped before opening my car door to look at every bit of sky I could see... just trying to find one (however itty bitty) cloud. I could not find one. As I sat down in my car, I rolled down every window and the moon roof and reaffirmed to myself out loud that today was going to be a great day. I was ready.
At each stop light on my way to the office (which if I remember correctly, there are 97 lights between Setauket & Hauppauge ... especially if you take route 347) I looked up at the sky through the moon roof. I was in complete amazement. In all my 20-some-odd years, I had never seen such a blue sky.
Upon entering the office, I went on my normal routine. Turned on the lights and computers. I turned on the office CD player and knew I had a good 1 1/2 hours before anyone else would arrive. At the time I was in the midst of a huge Harry Connick, Jr. phase and would often use his mellow tones to ease me into my day. But not today. I had pushed my southern boy to the side for my old standard, hometown boy, Billy Joel. As I rushed around the office, I sang along with BJ with a determined light heartedness I not had in at least a couple of months.
At approximately 8:50 AM I received a phone call from a friend telling me that "some jackass drove a plane in the World Trade Center.... and you thought you had a bad day yesterday?" I rushed off the phone as I had things to do, shaking my head wondering how a pilot could manage that. He had to be drunk.
Just a few minutes after 9 AM, some of my co workers started into the office. Okay, we had a small staff and as much as I love them, being on time was not one of the respects they showed me. But today, their faces were stressed, confused, pale and they were rambling on. What? Another plane hit the WTC? My friend called back to let me know that this was no mistake. We were under attack. My breathtaking sky was now the backdrop to smoke, ashes, horror and the last breaths of thousands of people.
Since I did work for a not-for-profit, we did not have luxuries like Internet or television to be able to watch the news coverage. However, Billy did need to shut up, as we needed to listen to the news on the radio. As I look back now, I am glad that I did not have a television to see the 2nd plane hit or the towers fall. At least when I did see it happen, I knew it was coming.
Maybe another day I will write all the details of the day; that is if I ever really remember them. It really is a blur. I remember no cell phones or LAN lines working all day in New York. No way to find out if your friends and family were safe. There were so many people who were lucky to get out of the city that day, even if it did take them 15 hours and they were as dirty as could be. Meanwhile while so many were fleeing, Firefighters and Police were leaving their safe homes and heading in to try and save their brothers and those that they dedicated their lives to keep safe. The highways were closed to the rest of us.
After leaving work and stopping at my parent's house to check in, I arrived at my apartment. I spent the next 12 hours glued to news coverage, listening to helicopters and military planes fly overhead, and reminding myself not to think about what that smell was that was lingering in the air.
For the next few weeks (or longer), the average New Yorker lived in a Zombie like state. Some were consumed with news coverage. Some were angry. Some were searching for their loved ones that were still missing. Some found God. Many were attending funerals. Many were looking for someway to payback. Most gave in any way we could to neighbors and charities that needed our help. All of us cried. All of us were looking for reasons why.
Commuting on Long Island is a nightmare that could turn the most calm person into a road rage offender. But during those weeks, drivers were courteous and I received many friendly hellos from strangers, which I had never seen before on LI. However, for weeks the commutes were worse than ever. You could not drive without running into a funeral procession or hitting traffic by a funeral home or fire house. Those purple flags hung for months on each fire house. However, I did not want to go to the Railroad station. There, you would see THEIR CARS. The cars that were there last time you were there... in the same spot. The ones that their owners left behind on that Tuesday Morning and never came back for.
The one sight that would lighten my mood was seeing my beautiful "Old Glory" everywhere I went. This Flag Day baby has never seen a more beautiful sight than the stars and stripes blowing in the wind. Every car, house, business, highway overpass... Everywhere you looked was the Red, White & Blue hung with pride. The one thought that made me feel better was knowing PaPa did not have to see what happened that day.
As with all things, time began to heal wounds. I don't believe they will ever completely be mended; For sure, the scars are deep. I am a lucky one. Of course, I know people whose journey ended that day but I did not lose a family member or a close friend.
However, something precious to me was taken from me on 9/11... blue skies. For eight years I have never seen a more beautiful sky than I did that morning. Any one that has even come close quickly reminds me of that day and shrouds me in sadness, even if only for a few minutes.
In my mind I have fought this. I don't want to give that to those who attacked us. One day, I will look at a blue sky and just bask in it again. The only thing that could make that day better was if while doing so I saw American Flags hung with pride for no reason. If people where just proud to be Americans because of our history, present & future... not because someone punched us in the eye.
I look forward to that day. But tonight, I make the decision to not let them take football from me as well. Even as Harry just sang the Star Spangled Banner in his fabulous voice, just as he began to sing "Recipe for Love" that morning. I remember that day and send my prayers to all those who lost their life that day. But I will not let terrorists win anymore.

"Where Were You (When The World Stopped Turning)"
By Alan Jackson
Where were you when the world stopped turning that September day
Out in the yard with your wife and children
Working on some stage in LA
Did you stand there in shock at the site of
That black smoke rising against that blue sky
Did you shout out in anger
In fear for your neighbor
Or did you just sit down and cry
Did you weep for the children
Who lost their dear loved ones
And pray for the ones who don't know
Did you rejoice for the people who walked from the rubble
And sob for the ones left below
Did you burst out in pride
For the red white and blue
The heroes who died just doing what they do
Did you look up to heaven for some kind of answer
And look at yourself to what really matters

I'm just a singer of simple songs
I'm not a real political man
I watch CNN but I'm not sure I can tell you
The difference in Iraq and Iran
But I know Jesus and I talk to God
And I remember this from when I was young
Faith hope and love are some good things he gave us
And the greatest is love

Where were you when the world stopped turning that September day
Teaching a class full of innocent children
Driving down some cold interstate
Did you feel guilty cause you're a survivor
In a crowded room did you feel alone
Did you call up your mother and tell her you love her
Did you dust off that bible at home
Did you open your eyes and hope it never happened
Close your eyes and not go to sleep
Did you notice the sunset the first time in ages
Speak with some stranger on the street
Did you lay down at night and think of tomorrow
Go out and buy you a gun
Did you turn off that violent old movie you're watching
And turn on "I Love Lucy" reruns
Did you go to a church and hold hands with some stranger
Stand in line and give your own blood
Did you just stay home and cling tight to your family
Thank God you had somebody to love

I'm just a singer of simple songs
I'm not a real political man
I watch CNN but I'm not sure I can tell you
The difference in Iraq and Iran
But I know Jesus and I talk to God
And I remember this from when I was young
Faith hope and love are some good things he gave us
And the greatest is love

I'm just a singer of simple songs
I'm not a real political man
I watch CNN but I'm not sure I can tell you
The difference in Iraq and Iran
But I know Jesus and I talk to God
And I remember this from when I was young
Faith hope and love are some good things he gave us
And the greatest is love
The greatest is love
The greatest is love
Where were you when the world stopped turning that September day